Or that you have to smile 100% of the time. I’m also going to let you in on a big secret (that I already sort of spilled the beans on): being happy doesn’t mean you’re never sad. I have to remember it’s a journey, not a destination.
I, for one, can say I MOSTLY don’t feel the need for anyone’s approval to do my thang, but sometimes I definitely have to check myself when the anxiety/fear/overwhelm/self-doubt/comparison starts to creep in. Are some of the things you think make you happy really based on feedback from others? Do you feel outside forces have to “approve” of or influence your choices in order for them to be relevant or valid? (And yes, things like the number of friends/likes/comments you have on various social media platforms count as outside influence!) And really be honest with yourself if this is something you think is true for the various aspects of your life you might be feeling insecure in. Happiness is when you feel good about yourself without needing anyone else’s approval. I’ve done a lot of research and thinking on the subject (and the quote from Mandy Hale above is a good place to start), but ultimately here is one of the simplest methodologies when it comes to measuring happiness: But - for the sake of context - I do think it’s important that we have a way to measure happiness on some type of mutually understood level so we can start on the same page. We’re fluid creatures, always changing and evolving, so it makes sense that a state of our being is also fluid. In fact, it’s downright awesome that we’re our own unique selves. I mean I can say with a high level of certainty that spiders make me quite unhappy, but who knows - you may love the terrifying cute(?) creatures. My point is, what makes me happy might not make you happy and vice versa, and that’s A-OK. While we could probably debate the point forever, let’s just agree right up front that happiness - just like health and wellness - is personal and subjective. Of course this then begs the question: what the heck does being happy mean? (Although I wish I could randomly throw confetti at strangers sometimes. If someone asks me “Are you happy?” I can genuinely say yes.ĭoes that mean I never get sad or depressed or anxious? Does that mean there is nothing I would change about my life? Does that mean I have a smile plastered on 24/7 and I literally throw confetti at random passerbys on the street? While I think (at least I hope) that if you’re reading this it’s because you love all the color and magic shared around these parts, can we step back for a minute and really think about what happiness is/means? So now I’m going to ask you a loaded question: Are you happy?
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